Before prayer in the schools we had the Crusades
and we cleaned out the stockpot once a year.
Virtually everything we ate induced narcosis,
a condition we often confused with god.
Some told of a river that ran outside the city walls
and of how it moved to avoid their touch,
a giant serpent twisting forever away. If it wasn’t the devil
it was the work of the devil, like everything else we wanted.
Remorse held us together until we died young
and most of us never realized we were mammals—
indeed we were suspicious of birds but rats, well, rats
we found charming, with their eyes so full
of sympathy, their need for warmth like our own. We also
wanted love to suffice. Flies that collected on the lesions
of the dying: angels one and all: no one could be too careful.
It seemed a flood was forever rinsing ideas from my tongue
so I said nothing or spoke louder, I was always drowning.
I couldn’t have changed anything.
All right there was the alchemist
and I loved him but I could not save him.
Once I dreamt of electricity. Was this the river,
the one that altered its course like a wounded thing?
We had no trees, only sticks.
Huge gears turned in the sky.
- Mark Bibbins
Today the sun was shining
so my neighbor washed her nightdresses in the river—
she comes home with everything folded in a basket,
beaming, as though her life had just been
lengthened a decade. Cleanliness makes her happy—
it says you can begin again,
the old mistakes needn’t hold you back.
A good neighbor—we leave each other
to our privacies. Just now
she’s singing to herself, pinning the damp wash to the line.
Little by little, days like this
will seem normal. But winter was hard:
the nights coming early, the dawns dark
with a gray, persistent rain—months of that,
and then the snow, like silence coming from the sky,
obliterating the trees and gardens.
Today, all that’s past us.
The birds are back, chattering over seeds.
All the snow’s melted; the fruit trees are covered with downy new growth.
A few couples even walk in the meadow, promising whatever they promise.
We stand in the sun and the sun heals us.
It doesn’t rush away. It hangs above us, unmoving,
like an actor pleased with his welcome.
My neighbor’s quiet a moment,
staring at the mountain, listening to the birds.
So many garments, where did they come from?
And my neighbor’s still out there,
fixing them to the line, as though the basket would never be empty—
It’s still full, nothing is finished,
though the sun’s beginning to move lower in the sky;
remember, it isn’t summer yet, only the beginning of spring;
warmth hasn’t taken hold yet, and the cold’s returning—
She feels it, as though the last bit of linen had frozen in her hands.
She looks at her hands—how old they are. It’s not the beginning, it’s the end.
And the adults, they’re all dead now.
Only the children are left, alone, growing old.
- Louise Gluck
I was in the town before my end. I knew more deeply
than before I was in trouble with drinking.
I received a copy of a Graham Greene novel, The End of the Affair, in the mail.
I sat down to read it one night, sure I would not like it,
but I could not stop reading.
I felt the romance of the book was validating one more wild prolonged fling,
alcohol at the center of the fling. I had no one in mind but I knew there would be
someone. And I knew it would be trouble.
The novel made me feel as if I could see it all.
In the middle of the night there was a knock on the door.
A neighbor—I had met no one in the few days I had been in town—
asked if I would drive her and her daughter to the hospital.
Her daughter was sick, she had no car. She had seen my light.
For some reason I was glad to do so. I took the book.
The wait was long, the mother finally told me I could leave,
she could call a relative if they had to leave the hospital.
I saw them on the street days later—she hardly spoke—I wondered if it was because
we were of different races. She simply nodded when I asked if her daughter
was all right.
They left their house within a month. The house became a place for itinerants.
Six families in six months. One afternoon I heard screaming and cackling
and looked out the window to see an overweight man who could hardly walk
limping and tilting away from the old woman on the porch.
She both screamed and cackled. The overweight man finally
hobbled off like an old wagon.
I want to thank the woman and her child for interrupting my reverie.
Although I proceeded to wildly continue an affair for drinking
I feel that couple as a pull from life, a pull
from a source I was for a final time denying.
The book meant more than life. How I shaded the book
meant more than anything, anyone.
- Michael Burkard
After the sun rose into rust between gravel and horizon,
after the scent of you oxidized the steel of my car going
into the lidocaine of the morning air as the highway slid
into northeast Detroit past Chill & Mingle,
I did a double-take and took a wrong turn at Rim Repair.
(Long ago my father said I should see the fist).
No one spoke Swahili on 12th Street, still rubble
after the blind pigs folded up.
It was a cliché of the image of itself but it was, it was
like nothing, the vacant burned-out bungalows, car parts, metal scraps
arson jobs, abandoned homes, barbed wire playgrounds,
shacks pummeled along Six Mile Road—derelict since ’67.
My father said when Louis won, the radio static was a wave
of sound that stayed all night like the riots blocks away in Harlem,
as the scent of lilac and gin wafted down Broadway to his window
across from the Columbia gates where the sounds of
Fletcher Henderson and Dizzy buzzed the air,
where the mock Nazi salutes were shadows over the
granite lions and snake-dancing, and car horns
banged the tar and busted windshields,
even coffee shops south of 116th were looted.
It came back in fragments—through the gauze
of the summer of love, through Lucy in the Sky
and other amnesias; streets of burnt-out buildings,
paratroopers bivouacked in high schools with gas and bayonets.
By 6 a.m. July 23 national guards were walking
in the rain of black cinder and pillars of smoke—
a black body hanging from a fence of an auto part yard,
whisky-faced boys shooting through the fire
as torn bags of loot trailed the streets.
Prostitutes used pool cues to defend themselves.
Booze and cartridge smoke ate their skin.
One trooper said it looked like Berlin in ’45.
Samson, David, and Elijah in one left hook
my father said, (6/22/38) upbraided Neville Chamberlain
liberated Austria and Sudetenland
knocked the lights out in Berlin—
sent Polish Jews into the boulevards
for one night of phantasmal liberation.
Because Hitler banned jazz, because Black Moses led
crowds and crowds to the marvelous, inscrutable, overwhelming
balked dreams of revenge, millions seeped out of doorways, alleys, tenements—
dreaming of the diamond pots, of Chrysler heaven,
the golden girls of Hollywood and Shirley Temple
who rubbed some salt into his hands for luck.
Untermensch from Alabama—
sucker for the right hand—the other side of Hailee Salisee
black men howled to him from their electric chairs.
When I drove past Berry Gordy Jr. Boulevard
and the Hitsville USA sign on the studio-house,
the lights were out and I could only
imagine the snake pit where Smokey Robinson
spun into vinyl, where “Heat Wave”
came as sweet blackmail in the beach air of ’64
where the Funkbrothers and Martha Reeves
took the mini opera and dumped it on its head.
By the time I hit Jefferson and Woodward
the sun was glaring on the high windows.
and then it hit me—spinning the light—
horizontal two-foot arm smashing the blue
through the empty pyramid holding it up
in the glare of skyscraper glass: molten
bronze-hand, hypotenuse of history,
the smooth-casting over the gouged-out wounds—
the naked, beloved, half-known forms.
- Peter Balakian
Hide what is far from my eyes,
pale fog, impalpable gray
vapor climbing the light
of the coming day,
after the storm-streaked night,
the rockfall skies…
Hide what has gone, and what goes,
hide what lies beyond me…
Let me see only that hedge
at my boundary,
and this wall, by whose crumbling edge
Hide from my eyes what is dead:
the world is drunk on tears…
Show my two peach trees in bloom,
my two pears,
that spread their sugared balm
on my black bread.
Hide from my eyes lost things
whose need for my love is a goad...
Let me see only the white
of the stone road –
I too will ride it some night
as a tired bell rings.
Hide the far things – hide
them beyond the sweep of my heart...
Show only that cypress tree,
and here, lying sleepily,
this dog at my side.
- Giovanni Pascoli, trans. from Italian by Geoffrey Brock
Only the car radio
driving from the drugstore to the restaurant to his apartment:
rock and roll, oldies but goodies,
and sometimes, softly, piano music
rising from the piano teacher's apartment on the first floor.
Most of it happened without music,
the clink of a spoon from the kitchen,
someone talking. Silence.
Somebody sleeping. Someone watching somebody sleep.
- Marie Howe
A boy drowns in a lake. Another opens
his head against a steering wheel. Another
goes downtown. Into a boardroom. Into
leveraged buyouts. Into Italian shoes.
Into spearheading something. Hi, you’ve reached
Victoria Chang. I’m not at my desk right now.
Please leave a message at the beep. Never mind
the kickbacks, passing the sound barrier in
the Concorde, its needle-nosed body. How much
mahogany we all had. Cheese stabbed with
sticks our teeth tugged on. How many drivers
in black cars we said Happy Valentine’s Day to.
Each morning, I put on those shoes, legs,
nylons, sex, black briefs with texts. Each
dusk, there were martinis, drinks that said
Cocktail! No choice. Of course, starters, soup
& salad, main meal, dessert, coffee. Always
in that order. Business models. Pigeons on
ledges I watched. Dimmed rooms with white
screens, a man with a pointer. No one stops
him. Someone make him stop. My watch gets
tired from looking up at me. The next table is
once again pioneering something. I can shake
a hundred hands in an hour. Watch me.
Thirteen dollars a share. The man on the phone line
has a rope in his throat. The closing price is
rouged. We can believe in God again. The banks
are full. The streets are hungover. The man on
my left is rich. The man on my right is a month
from dead. The Champagne ditches its bottle.
The London air free-falls in the hotel room.
There are plates of carved fruit. New York is
cheering through the phone. Heaven must
be this way. Tomorrow, Germany. Then Paris.
Hello. Goodbye. Where’s the bathroom? I don’t
understand. I am lost. How much?
A man carrying a tray of sandwiches.
A woman on a cell phone. The doorman
on California Street. The cable-car driver.
No one knows how beautiful the check
looks in my wallet. $94 million. Tomorrow,
$106 million. From: IV Drip. To: Bob
Dahl. From: Ivy hiccupping up a wall.
To: John Hedge. Everyone is drunk today.
Everyone is preparing for sex today. Little
turquoise boxes with white ribbon are hand-
delivered around town today. The smell of
beef is powerful. The cemeteries are still full.
Tired of the stitched ball, line of breeze.
Tired of the corporate seats. The Samsung.
The Solectron. The Synopsys. The Pitch.
Positioning. Presentations. Tired of summer
that can’t stop its inverting. Of the cartoon ball
under the cartoon hats that keep moving.
One, two, three, the crowd shouts. Someday
the big screen will dangle in rust. The headless
field will become untethered. Someday
the rain will withdraw from the sleeping dog.
Somewhere in a kitchen, a mother will watch
the last piece of beef fall off a bone.
- Victoria Chang
One must have a mind of winter
To regard the frost and the boughs
Of the pine-trees crusted with snow;
And have been cold a long time
To behold the junipers shagged with ice,
The spruces rough in the distant glitter
Of the January sun; and not to think
Of any misery in the sound of the wind,
In the sound of a few leaves,
Which is the sound of the land
Full of the same wind
That is blowing in the same bare place
For the listener, who listens in the snow,
And, nothing himself, beholds
Nothing that is not there and the nothing that is.
- Wallace Stevens
Across from the charred white bar and grill, in the place where the
Irish still bury their dead, I stood next to your grave. Looking at it
then, it didn’t seem so final.
There was a light that fell across the marker the amber color of an
empty pill bottle.
And the distance was false.
You were gone but here, like the picture you took of sailboats on
TV. Like the handwriting of a letter you wrote in 1961.
As the light faded, my vision narrowed, and I saw the grave had
grown four legs and a long, prehensile tail.
I watched as it crawled away, a green, stone-headed creature, in a
halo of blue whatever.
- Christopher Kennedy, from “Clues From the Animal Kingdom”
My mother was washing dishes;
a turquoise pendant
dangled at her sternum
as she looked out onto the patio,
the bees cross-pollinating
her Mortgage Lifters,
her Big Boys, her Fourth
of Julys. My father came home
on the late bus, walked through
the dandelions with his
brown leather shoes
and fished the newspaper
from the hydrangea.
My sister chalked
a circle on the driveway
and stepped inside.
The next day, my mother
rode the gondola up the mountain
—she wanted to really
see the moon—
and my father discovered
country music, that he had
a voice for those sad, celestial notes.
And my sister played croquet
by her own rules, sent
balls with coloured stripes
plock plocking all over the yard.
- Clear Roberts
You who never arrived
in my arms, Beloved, who were lost
from the start,
I don't even know what songs
would please you. I have given up trying
to recognize you in the surging wave of the next
moment. All the immense
images in me—the far-off, deeply-felt landscape,
cities, towers, and bridges, and un-
suspected turns in the path,
and those powerful lands that were once
pulsing with the life of the gods—
all rise within me to mean
you, who forever elude me.
You, Beloved, who are all
the gardens I have ever gazed at,
longing. An open window
in a country house—, and you almost
stepped out, pensive, to meet me. Streets that I chanced upon,—
you had just walked down them and vanished.
And sometimes, in a shop, the mirrors
were still dizzy with your presence and, startled, gave back
my too-sudden image. Who knows? perhaps the same
bird echoed through both of us
yesterday, separate, in the evening...
- Rainer Maria Rilke
Quiet as is proper for such places;
The street, subdued, half-snow, half-rain,
Endless, but ending in the darkened doors.
Inside, they who will be there always,
Quiet as is proper for such people--
Enough for now to be here, and
To know my door is one of these.
- Robert Creeley
Muscles and torsoes of cloud
ascended over the mountains.
The fields looked like high speed
so new-mown was the hay,
then the dark blue Italian lavender
met overhead, a strange maize
deeply planted as mass javelins
in the hoed floor of the land.
Insects in plastic armour stared
from their turrets, and munched
as others machined stiffly over us
and we turned, enchanted
in sweet walling breath
under far-up gables of the lavender.
- Les Murray
It was a quiet afternoon.
Outside, in the corridor, I heard
a door slam
and a woman's crying, which
slowly diminished in the distance.
Then I heard the door
again, though it stayed silent.
- Jurgen Becker, trans. by Okla Elliott
Now wakes a path between the oaks, now
falls a spell of dove and frog, and stones
dream of their mountain clans and each stick
breaks to hear its name. Now light edges creek
and water appears as a quick coin trick or
silk pulled from a funnel of months, now
behind us, at last, and shade and sky fill
the mirror moving from next to next. Now
do you see there is no stillness to this world?
Even in sleep a seed is knitting its breach
from the dark and the body hums
on the march to becoming less and right
now; words depart then arrive, like a brush
returning to a well of color.
- Emma Trelles
I squeeze the aloe
flesh over my knees
as your cousin scolds me
for saying ocean
when we are by a sea.
To me this is casual—
isn’t it all the same water?—
to her it isn’t.
What I could call her
is colonist since
it takes one to know.
Later, I wake when evening
still stains viridian
above the pink
and lemon neighborhood
to the schhh
of your grandfather’s
slippers on the tile which I hear
as the first soft syllable
of the name
we share. Six years
now you and I don’t speak.
If I was not in love
there are secrets
a self keeps safe—
if I was you were right
to forget me.
- Sam Ross, from Company
The Chinese truck driver
throws the rope
like a lasso, with a practiced flick,
over the load:
where it hovers an instant,
then arcs like a willow
into the waiting,
of his brother.
What does it matter
that, sitting in traffic,
I glanced out the window
and found them that way?
So lean and sleek-muscled
in their sweat-stiffened t-shirts:
offloading the pallets
just so they can load up
again in the morning,
and so on,
and so forth,
forever like that—
I might tell them
if I spoke Mandarin,
or had a Marlboro to offer,
or thought for a minute
they’d believe it
when I say that I know
how it feels
to break your own
back for a living.
what’s the difference?
When every light
for a mile turns
green all at once,
no matter how much
I might like
to keep watching
the older one squint
and blow smoke
through his nose?
Something like sadness,
like joy, like a sudden
love for my life,
and for the body
in which I have lived it,
overtaking me all at once,
as a bus driver honks
and the setting
sun glints, so bright
off a windshield
I wince and look back
and it’s gone.
- Patrick Phillips
When, at the end, the children wanted
to add glitter to their valentines, I said no.
I said nope, no, no glitter, and then,
when they started to fuss, I found myself
saying something my brother’s football coach
used to bark from the sidelines when one
of his players showed signs of being
human: oh come on now, suck it up.
That’s what I said to my children.
Suck what up? my daughter asked,
and, because she is so young, I told her
I didn’t know and never mind, and she took
that for an answer. My children are so young
when I turn off the radio as the news turns
to counting the dead or naming the act,
they aren’t even suspicious. My children
are so young they cannot imagine a world
like the one they live in. Their God is still
a real God, a whole God, a God made wholly
of actions. And I think they think I work
for that God. And I know they will someday soon
see everything and they will know about
everything and they will no longer take
never mind for an answer. The valentines
would’ve been better with glitter, and my son
hurt himself on an envelope, and then, much
later, when we were eating dinner, my daughter
realized she’d forgotten one of the three
Henrys in her class. How can there be three Henrys
in one class? I said, and she said, Because there are.
And so, before bed we took everything out
again—paper and pens and stamps and scissors—
and she sat at the table with her freshly washed hair
parted smartly down the middle and wrote
WILL YOU BE MINE, HENRY T.? and she did it
so carefully, I could hardly stand to watch.
- Carrie Fountain (Originally published on poets.org)
There they are now,
And I heard them beginning to starve
Between two cold white shadows,
But I dreamed they would rise
My black Ohioan swan.
Now one after another I let the black scales fall
From the beautiful black spine
Of this lonesome dragon that is born on the earth at last,
My black fire,
Ovoid of my darkness,
Machine-gunned and shattered hillsides of yellow trees
In the Autumn of my blood where the apples
Purse their wild lips and smirk knowingly
That my love is dead.
Here, carry his splintered bones
Back into the
Tar and chemical strangled tomb,
The strange water, the
Ohio river, that is no tomb to
Rise from the dead
- James Wright, from Shall We Gather at the River
And I thought only characters in film alternated between
laughter and tears in the shower when it thundered.
When it was my turn to cry, I bent my head
and closed my eyes and the colors were a diaspora.
I spent a lot of time deciphering twigs from worms.
My horoscope says many Leos will die today. Another horoscope
says strut your stuff. That a whole generation
won’t know the sound of a rotary dial in their ear.
I swallow and think of who you last loved; bent over the way I am
I bend my head to take her into me. You will experience a Disintegration.
If there is anything to be known about obsession,
it is to say by staring, I could take her into me.
I’ve stared at someone’s name for that long,
the tears decrescendo, sunset shampooed and alive.
Mondrian doll faces in the grime of the window, Botticelli shoulders
mermaids and anime girls with pearl earrings.
It’s 10:36: I was born at this time. You will
laugh as the thunder comes. Your mind will wring you dry.
- Jessica Scicchitano (first published in Columbia Journal)